Gabriel Jonah Feingold-Swain
(1988 - 2009)

friend and co-worker

I answered an ad in the news-press for a 'trailer' rental on the Westside in May of 1988. Diane opened the back gate holding a tiny baby with the curliest hair I had ever seen. My first thought was, 'there wasn't any mention of a baby in the ad!'. I'd have to think about that -- I had no experience around little kids and wasn't sure I wanted any. The trailer in question was an old travel model that Michael had dragged across the county from Iowa -- when, at the turn of the century?? Kidding of course, he had it all hooked up and was conveniently tucked away behind a hedge in their backyard with a tiny, I mean tiny, shower and toilet and working kitchen. I immediately loved it and moved in the next week. I never saw myself as a trailer dweller before but I have SO many fond memories since. They had the most beautiful golden retriever named Kelli who had lost rights to the house with the new baby and soon came to live in the trailer with me. I also fell in love with little Gabe and his family and lived back there for over 3 years. Caught pneumonia selling palm trees off a cart at La Cumbre because Michael thought the holiday season was ripe for palm retail. None of us new it was El Nino. They were all so sick at one point, Diane called me on the phone (they were 10 feet across the hedge) and asked if I could get some pedialyte for all of them (I could hear someone throwing up in the background). She slid the money out the door but even the small crack in the window let out the smells of 4 people who had had the stomach flu for 3 days which knocked Kelli and I flat off the porch. I left the fluids and ran.

Somehow we all grew up from there. I lost track of Gabriel in later years but have run into Michael and Diane in and about Santa Barbara. So I can't speak for what Gabriel was going through as grew into a young adult and then young man. I do know that to make the choice he did he must have been in a lot of pain. It is no consolation to any of us but I hope he has finally found the peace he could not find here on Earth. God bless you Gabriel. I miss your curly, curly hair.