Barbara Ann Fyffe (Benedict Castle)
(1936 - 2009)

"This is the memorial I set up for Barbara Fyffe. To add your own comment, click on the "Add Comment" button below. "

"I love you mom..."

"Barb, my neighbor and dear friend.I have fond memories of our times together over the years. All the coffees, breakfasts, lunches and "Friar Tucks" trips as well as many notes and cards shared through our joys and sorrows. Lots of laughter and good times; also of our children's school days activities together. Band and orchestra concerts as well as many ball games. My husband, Mel, enjoyed having met you too.
Dear Barb, you will be missed.Praying for the family."

"barb, thank you for always being able to put a smile on my face. we will miss you."

"The one thing that comes to my mind about Mrs. Fyffe is that she was at every,well most every event that took place at Kimball High School. Whether it be a band concert, play or football game she was there with her beautiful smile.
The family is in our thoughts and prayers.
Sincerely, Mary Clemons (Fournier)"

"Barb is my most precious, forever sister friend ... we are "tied together with a golden thread," just as we always have been since the day we met, over 50 years ago. I will always love you, my dearest friend ... death does not change that."

"but for a moment the shifting world suspends
its flight and leans toward the sun once more,
as if to interrupt its mindless plunge
through works and days that will not come again.
I hold myself immobile in the bright air,
sustained in time astride the flying change."

""Say hi to my mom" says Kari as she hands me the phone about a year and a half ago. Barb and I hadn't met yet and it felt more that a little awkward to be introduced this way, but that melted away quickly as we began to talk. Barbara had a wonderful gift of having a deep and genuine interest in the common threads and mutual connections with others' lives. I always felt so comfortable talking to her and sharing our love for Kari. What a warm and beautiful soul!!"

"My grandmother was the most beautiful person I have ever known. I can't come up with appropriate words to describe what she means to me. All of the wonderful letters, newspaper clippings, cards and collages I have received over the years. The long phone calls, the visits and the special gifts. The one word that I keep coming back to, the only word that can even begin to describe my grandmother, is love.

She had love in every thing she did, every song she ever played, every letter she sent and for every person she ever spoke to. I will miss that constant, never changing presence in my life. Every time I address on envelope, sing or play music or drive away from home and make a sign language "I love you," towards the window I will miss her, and the only thing I can think to do in this time of loss is to keep a song in my heart and try to share love the way that she did."

"After being diagnosed with cancer, my grandmother began keeping a journal in which she wrote when and what medications she took and what she ate that day. And that’s really all that I thought was in there. Shortly after her passing, I opened that journal and found that on almost everyday, she had written little notes about phone calls or letters she received. She also wrote in birthdays, anniversaries, and just day-to-day occurrences. I just broke into tears; here was my grandmother, in constant and excruciating pain, and she writes in her journal how she is worried about the bad weather and the people having to drive in it. I mean, how terrible am I? Even when she is completely justified to complain and be self-absorbed, my grandmother shows more genuine compassion and thoughtfulness than some people show in their entire lives. Anyone that has met her is truly blessed; she has carried you in her thoughts, she has cared for you in her soul, and she has held you in her heart.

I love and miss her so much.

"

"I was blessed to not only have Barb as my next door neighbor for 20 years but also a surrogate mom in her. Barb and Bob have been such good examples to me in so many ways. I loved hearing their piano and beautiful singing through my kitchen window. I loved the snuggling I would see them do on their backyard swing while matching shirts were strung up on the clothing line. I would come home from work to songs or piano recitals on my answering machine. I loved hanging over the fence talking to both Bob and Barb. Barb loved her grandchildren so much. I hope I can have the affect on one single person's life in the positive way that she did for me. I will always love Barb. I will pray that God shows Bob, her family and friends a comfort and peace that they did not know was even possible at this time."

"Just an added note to say: My husband and I are honored to attend the memorial and luncheon in honor of Barb as well as my daughter, Linda Cummins Tanner."

"My grandma was importent to me......she was importent to all of us. She sent love with all letters,pictures,hugs and kisses.I will always remember the special birthday cards with your age spelt in pennies. And her famous signature xoxo. Grandma did have some funny quirks like "wears the phone" or charging the her cell phone all the time. But grandma struggling though cancer still found some energy + strength to teach me piano lesssons. When she sat down with me at the piano bench to play a duet,I was amazed that such a women with such a bad back and stomach pain would still sit down with me and play piano. Every monday piano lesson Gma had a smile on her face that filled me with joy!
I love my Gma + I miss her very much......Just remember Love Like Gma Did."

"to my childhood friends,... your mom was a stabilizing force in my youth. She always brought light and happiness. She was like a second mom to me. I am sad that she is gone but know that her influence lives on! She was the kind of person everyone wants to have for a best friend."

"Barb was my neighbor and dear friend for 40 plus years. I have so many loving memories of all the birthday and Christmas cards she had sent me over the many years. She was a kind person that always was interested in knowing what you were doing. She always had a smile to share with others. Dear Barb I miss you so much already. I love you always.
Christine Blaisus neighbor/friend"

"Bara my neighbor, my friend, my good telephone buddy. The coffee breaks at The Maple House in front of a blazing fire. The Brownie Troop we did together was good times. The trip to Toranto, Our Diet Group and many many other things. The last 1 1/2 years our telephone calls ended in I love you Betty, I love you Barb, call you in a couple of days. In my mind I see her sitting on a puffy white cloud floating with a bagel and cream cheese. I love you Barb what no Starbucks in heaven, you'll have to look into that for me.
Betty Blaisus Neighbor/Dear Friend"

"Mom, I'll remember most your kindness, your ability to take the worst and turn it around for the best, the way you remembered everyone and truly cared about every person. You made me feel special with your unconditional love. You had tremendous courage when the odds were against you. I was so proud of you and the fight you had. AMAZING! You are Truly an Angel and will live on in all the people you touched. I LOVE YOU MOM Ben"

"I had the privilege to be another daughter of Barb's, as the wife of her baby boy Ben. I remember when Barb and I were getting to know one another nearly twenty years ago she would ask me questions about my work, my family and me. I would respond with courteous but brief answers. But that didn't satisfy Barb. She wasn't trying to just be nice she really wanted to know about me, the names of my siblings and their husband and children, when their birthdays and where they lived. She wanted to know about my latest business trip and truly worried when I had to be away from home. I know that many of you know what I am talking about. She took the time, so few of us do in our busy lives, to really connect with each other. It's that connection that made me feel very loved and cared for. I will truly miss that connection but I know that her example of taking time for the ones you love is her enduring gift to us all.
Thank you for sharing your warm smile, the gift of joy and connection. I will always love you mom!"

"I am saddened by the loss of a dear friend. We shared many moments together for more than forty years. I will miss Barb's friendship, her joy, her smile, all of those wonderful cards and her beautiful music. My prayers to all of the family.

Margie Pivitt"

"Barb was my dearest friend for over 47 yrs., we also worked together at Norwood for 10yrs. She always had a smile, she was a sweet person,and I surely will miss her. I was neighbor in Royal Oak,lived on Briarwood.
But we had to move to IL near our 2 sons. But Barbara & I still kept in touch. She would always send me poems or items she felt would help me with this big change in my life. She was always there when I needed her. We would talk on the phone for a long time. I will miss all that from my Dearest Friend, Barb.
I send my condolences to her family.
I wish I could attend her celebration, but I have some health problems. So I send my love and prayers to all her family and friends.
I surely will miss my sweet friend Barbara very much."

"To know Barb was a wonderful gift. Her heart seemed to expand as she lovingly accepted more and more people into her life. She made sure that we experienced genuine interest and affection whenever we were around her. Barb made a lasting impression on us and we will work hard to live life according to her wonderful example. God Bless you, Barb. Love, the furton's"

"Grandma Castle/Fyffe (not by blood but by LOVE!) You were for sure one of Gods'heavenly angels sent from above. It never mattered how much time had passed when ever we would visit, you would always welcomed us with those wide open LOVING arms with a scrumptious hug.Even though we weren't biologicaly you'r family you always had that way of showing us uncondtionaly it didn't matter, you LOVED us just the same. It surely took a special person to do that! That is what this world needs more of; Grandma Castle/Fyffe's Until we meet again, God Bless, Love the Moore gang. "

"First my deepest sympathies for your loss, and apologies for missing the memorial.

Barabara was one of the most wonderful people on the planet and the world was richer for having known her, and poorer now that she has left us.

Barb and I worked together for the Berkley Public Schools back many decades ago -- she was as dedicated, warm hearted and generous as the media assistant at Tyndall Elementary as she was in every other aspect of her life. It was my personal and professional priviledge to have worked with her and to have grown to be her friend. I deeply regret that work took me out of the State and widened the gap between times when Barb and I connected......

She will always be remembered with the greatest fondness. Thank you so much for including so many wonderful photographs on the website!!
"

"Barb was my childhood piano teacher and a family friend. My first Christmas card every year was always from Barb, and it always included the news about her kids and grandchildren. She was always so proud of her family!

Even though I didn’t stick with the piano, my son grew up being very involved with music and orchestra. Whenever I saw Barb she was always very interested in hearing about his latest musical endeavors and my family. She will be missed!"

"Dear Mrs. Castle:

I am getting long in the tooth myself, and one of the interesting benefits of acquiring long teeth is to - finally - begin to understand all the old sayings that I used to scoff at in my early days. Here’s a good one: “Youth is truly wasted on the young.”

I knew you when I was very very young...your stunning bright deep-feeling daughters were my best friends in high school. I remember that I always heard oddball music in your home; Carol had to tell me that it was called “classical.” There were large instruments hanging around, stranding tall like sentries in the living room. How weird, I thought. And books: you were an avid reader, a lover of language and the (to me, at the time) highbrow arts. I once spotted you outside sitting in a chair in the sun on a warm summer evening. “What is she doing?” I asked Benny, deeply confused. Ben was little, maybe nine or ten. He looked at me like I was a Martian. “She’s reading Grapes of Wrath,” he explained. Oh. Right. What a strange mother, I thought.

As I got to know you, I remember being a bit taken aback by your interest in me....It was something I simply wasn’t all that familiar with, your curious and intimate inclinations. It may be that you were the first adult person to ask my opinion of something...anything...and actually listen to my response with a thoughtful expression on your face. I have to admit that at first I wondered if you were suspicious of me, your daughters’ new friend. I wondered if you were “checking me out.” But I soon realized that you turned this beam on everyone, this loving gaze of inquiry and warmth and love and acceptance. I know that you noticed that I responded very favorably to your nurturing. You saw things in me that I didn’t yet see in myself, things that no one else seemed to see. You saw my love for the “word,” and you gave me Walt Whitman for my high school graduation. I wonder if you ever knew that I went on to study literature in college, that I adore reading and writing, that I never pass a tattered paperback copy of Steinbeck’s Grapes of Wrath nor Leaves of Grass without immediately thinking of you and your warm beautiful smile.

I write this to be a part of the chorus of voices singing a song in praise of your life. I sing off-key, loudly. I want everyone to know, to remember always, that you lived remarkably well. You gave generously, selflessly. You touched countless lives and hearts with your kindness. As I wrote in an email to Kari, when I look back at my awkward beginnings, I see you standing there, smiling, encouraging. When I knew you, I was too young to realize that I had connected with a very special, very unusual person. I didn’t realize how your love would sustain me, would give me a sense of worth in lean times.

What a succes story - your life!

And I write this to you with a tinge of regret....I know you’re reading this somewhere else....But I want you to know I carry you in my heart. I will try to live as well as you have lived. Thank you.

I love you Ma.
Laury"

"What do you think has become of the old and young men?
And what do you think has become of the women and children?
The are alive and well somewhere;
The smallest sprout shows there is really no death....
All goes outward and onward...and nothing collapses,
And to die is different from what any one supposed, and luckier.

I depart as air...I shake my white locks at the runaway sun....
I bequeath myself to the dirt to grow from the grass I love,
If you want me again look for me under your bootsoles....
Failimg to fetch me at first, keep encouraged,
Missing me one place search another,
I stop somewhere waiting for you.

Leaves of Grass
Walt Whitman"

"As it is Christmastime I finally got busy and looked up Barb on the internet as I had not heard from her this past year. I am very saddened that she is gone - she was a wonderful friend and piano teacher. Barb was such a positive influence in my life; she was a great listener, gave support and encouragment and always had a smile and hug for me. And it was through her that piano became such a focus in my young life and I continue to practice still.
My condolences to each of her children and their families. But what a wonderful spirit to carry with you through your lives. Peace to each of you this Christmas. In loving memory, Dian Cromar Torphy "